In this action adventure spun off from a video game, half-human, half-vampire rebel spirit Rayne is pitted against a dark evil from another time — a squad of undead Nazi warriors trying to inject Adolf Hitler with Rayne’s blood to make him immortal
When teenager Nathan comes across his own childhood picture while scrolling through a missing persons website, he begins to question everything he ever took for granted — including the people he always assumed were his parents.
CONSENSUS: “Nude Nuns with Big Guns delivers plenty of boobs and violence. It is obviously trying to embrace the Tarantino Grindhouse aesthetic. To some degree it is successful. If you are the type to watch a flick like this, you will likely get some enjoyment out of it. We could have done without the rape scenes, however. They took a
When the older brother (Tommy Nash) he idolizes is run off the road by a ruthless drug dealer (Darren Thomas) during a nighttime street race known as Sepulveda Suicide, Rick Merchant (Jaz Martin) channels his grief into getting revenge behind the wheel. But to win, he’ll need to modify his trusty 1978 Datsun 280Z — with help from a pretty mechanic (Hennely Jimenez) — to get the maximum speed out of its machinery
Ed the chimpanzee is more than just a mascot for the Santa Rosa Rockets — he’s actually talented enough to play third base. But when the team starts winning and Ed becomes a star, he’s sold by the team’s greedy owners. Ed’s fans and teammates are dismayed, but most devastated of all is Ed’s “roommate,” a pitcher (Matt LeBlanc) who gets cold feet when he plays but is learning to overcome it with the chimp’s help. Will they ever get Ed back?
CONSENSUS: “Cool as Ice is a must watch bad movie. Words can not express this movie’s triumph. It is astounding, amazing, jaw-dropping and perhaps the greatest thing to happen to western civilization.”
CONSENSUS: “Anne Heche is a good actress, but she can’t save Toxic Skies from failure. This run-of-the-mill disease movie is boring and low-fi. There are also numerous credibility issues here. It is best to skip this movie and find something else.” INSTAFLICKA INDEX 1.50 Thanks to a cruel and deadly government plot involving poisonous jet trails, the population of
CONSENSUS: “It is obviously a laughable throw-back science-fiction movie. Mars Needs Women is watchable and bizzare, but the fun is limited by its overly serious tone.”
CONSENSUS: “God awful. This movie is so bad, you can’t even laugh at how bad it is. DO NOT WATCH. It received the lowest score in the history of the InstaFlicka Podcast with a flat zero.”
CONSENSUS: “If you can laugh at bad movies, then you might be OK watching this laughably bad one; but if you can’t appreciate it on those terms, avoid Santa Claus Conquers the Martians like the plague. If nothing else, however, it would be good wallpaper for a holiday party.” INSTAFLICKA INDEX 1.83 The Martians are irked that their children spend
Jolly old Saint Nick (Bill Goldberg) isn’t making a gift list this year — he’s making a hit list, checking it twice and unleashing his inner demon for an unforgettably terrifying Christmas. A bet that Santa lost to an angel 1,000 years ago has expired, and now he’s hell-bent on spreading some holiday fear. As the big day approaches, only young Nicholas
CONSENSUS: “It looks fine, Julie Roberts and the cast are fine, everything is generally fine in terms of production value. What isn’t fine, is the story. It is god awful. Eat, Pray, Love is a pretentious examination of a personal melodrama that you can only classify as #firstworldproblems. Plus, it is boring.” INSTAFLICKA INDEX 1.50 Julia Roberts stars in
CONSENSUS: “A sad turn in the career of John Travolta, From Paris with Love is pretty bad. It is only worth watching if you intend on making fun it and to compare how much Travolta looks like Mr. Clean.” INSTAFLICKA INDEX 1.67 While working at the American embassy in Paris, low-level intelligence agent James Reece (Jonathan Rhys Meyers) gets
While Horvath (Alfred Molina) and Drake (Toby Kebbell) plot to restore Morgana Le Fay (Alice Krige) to power, master sorcerer Balthazar Blake (Nicolas Cage) makes physics student Dave Stutle (Jay Baruchel) his apprentice, teaching him enough magic to save the world from sure ruin. Also featuring Monica Bellucci, Teresa Palmer and Toby Kebbell, this whimsical fantasy is a live-action update
After a series of mysterious disasters occurs in the Pacific, from the disappearance of a plane to the destruction of an oil rig, a group of scientists discovers that a secret military mission has unearthed a prehistoric shark and a giant octopus. When the government learns of the existence of the menacing beasts, the team of scientists is tasked with